Free to Encourage

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Good morning, Chapel family! I hope all of you had a beautiful Easter. I have to say: when I look back on the weekend, it was beyond my expectations. From the Good Friday service to the Egg Hunt outreach on Saturday, and then Easter Sunday was just amazing. One of my favorite parts was seeing so many people that I had not seen in over a year—many of you came back in person for the first time on Easter, and it was just a joy. It felt like a big family reunion. And it felt like a big step toward normalcy, didn’t it? And I know some of you are not quite ready to come back in person, so you joined us online—and there was a great sense of celebration at our Online Campus too. And by the way, there were over 30 people who said they made a decision to give their life to Christ for the first time on Easter Sunday—isn’t that exciting? So to everyone who helped make Easter weekend the great success that it was, thank you. It is finished, and He is risen.

So, today we start a brand new series. We’re going to be walking through one of the most beloved books of the Bible: Paul’s letter to the Philippians. So let me just give you a little background. It was around the year 50AD when Paul the missionary first came to Europe, and the first European city he visited was Philippi, which is part of Greece today. You can read about that visit in Acts chapter 16. And as Paul proclaimed the gospel, people started believing. So there was a little church that started in that part of Greece. Now, there were also some people in Philippi who were not quite as receptive to Paul, and we’ll talk about that in a minute. So after spending some time in Philippi, Paul moved on.

Fast forward about twelve years—62 AD—and Paul found himself sitting in a prison, with his colleague, Timothy, in Rome. And from that prison, he decided to write a letter to his old friends in Philippi. So that’s the letter we’re going to be studying for the next seven weeks. It is such a great book, and I’m so excited about what God is going to do through this.

I’m calling the series “True Freedom.” Which is ironic, because when Paul was writing this letter, from every outward measure, he was not free. He wasn’t free to travel; he wasn’t free to visit his friends; he wasn’t free to choose what he was going to eat; he wasn’t free to work as a tentmaker, which was his trade; he wasn’t even free to go and start new churches, which was his calling. He was a prisoner of one of the most powerful regimes in history, the Roman Empire. And yet, when you read this letter, even though all his outer freedoms have been stripped away, you start to realize that you’re listening to a man who’s truly free. There’s a freedom inside him that nothing on the outside can take away.

And I think we desperately need to hear this message. Because, honestly, this life can sometimes feel like a prison. Can’t it? The prison walls might be physical sickness, or family drama, or economic hardship, or mistreatment by others. Have you ever felt trapped by life? So you naturally start to pray for your circumstances to change. But sometimes the change that’s needed isn’t out there; it’s in here. So through this letter, Paul shows how our relationship with Christ can create an inner freedom, no matter what’s going on outside of us. Honestly, we can’t control much of that (outer) By God’s grace, you we control this (inner).

Our first clue to finding this kind of freedom is actually in the very first verse. Look with me at Philippians 1, verse 1: Paul and Timothy, servants of Christ Jesus… And I’ll stop right there. In most of Paul’s letters, when he introduces himself, he calls himself an “apostle,”: which means a person

officially sent by God, carrying the authority of God. It’s an impressive title. But he doesn’t mention that here. What does he call himself? A servant. The Greek word is doulos.

When you hear the word “servant,” do you associate that with freedom? No! It sounds like just the opposite of freedom. And yet, that’s the first word, and the only word, that Paul uses to introduce himself. That’s really strange. Could it be that Paul had learned something about servanthood that opened the door to a deeper kind of freedom?

I recently read a book by a French monk named Jacques Philippe. It’s called Interior Freedom. And right at the beginning of the book, he says this: “For modern man, to be free often means throwing off all constraint and all authority…For Christianity, on the other hand, freedom can only be found by submitting to God…” So this is a countercultural idea. Paul calls himself a doulos—a servant! And yet he was free. I’m praying we can discover some of that same freedom over these next few weeks.

Before we dive into the first section, let me tell you one more thing that happened when Paul was in Philippi, twelve years earlier. He was actually there with his ministry partner, Silas. And the two of them were arrested for basically disturbing the peace; they were stripped and beaten, they were thrown in jail, and their feet were fastened in the stocks. And I’ve always been so moved by this verse—Acts 16:25 says About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. Think about that for a minute: their rights had been violated; their bodies were in pain; their future was very uncertain; all of their freedom had been stripped away. And how do they respond? They have a little impromptu worship service in jail. What do you think the other prisoners were thinking? Either, “These guys are insane,” or maybe, “I want what they have.” I’ve got to tell you: I want what they have. Don’t you? I want the kind of freedom that rises up and sings and prays, even when everything on the outside is a mess. I’ve tasted some of that, and I want some more. So these next seven weeks, let’s go after that together. True Freedom.

And today, I want to talk about being Free to Encourage. Normally, when you feel trapped by life, you turn inward, right? You feel sorry for yourself, and frankly, you feel like someone should be encouraging you. So what would it look like to reverse that, and turn outward?

Let’s read the passage together—Philippians 1, the first eleven verses. I invite you to hear the Word of God…

1 Paul and Timothy, servants of Christ Jesus,

To all God’s holy people in Christ Jesus at Philippi, together with the overseers and deacons:

2 Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

3 I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

7 It is right for me to feel this way about all of you, since I have you in my heart and, whether I am in chains or defending and confirming the gospel, all of you share in God’s grace with me. 8 God can testify how I long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus.

9 And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, 10 so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, 11 filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God. This is the Word of the Lord.

So as Paul begins the letter, he shows us three things about encouragement. It’s Thankful, it’s Affectionate, and it’s Optimistic. Thankful, affectionate, and optimistic.

So, first, encouragement is Thankful. Look at verses 3, 4 and 5: 3 I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now. As we go through this letter, it’s going to become really clear that Paul knows these people personally. He knows their names; he can picture their faces. And the thing that really connected them was their “partnership in the gospel.” That word “partnership” is the Greek word koinonia, which means “fellowship.” It’s more than just friendship. Friendship is great, but fellowship is deeper. Fellowship is the strong bond between people who are following and serving Christ together. So there’s a spiritual depth to the friendship. And Paul says, “From the first day I was with you, there’s been this fellowship bond between us.”

And remember, he hadn’t been with them for twelve years! But in all those years, the Christians in Philippi never forgot Paul. Multiple times, they had sent him gifts to support his ministry—money and food and clothing. When Paul became a Roman prisoner, there was a real social stigma to that. People normally didn’t want to be associated with a prisoner. But even then, the people in Philippi didn’t abandon Paul. They continued to stay in touch and send him gifts. The bond of fellowship was strong.

So as soon as he’s done with the opening greeting, what’s the first thing Paul tells these people? “I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy.” Those are powerful words. Those are powerfully encouraging words. “Every time you come into my mind, the first thing I feel is thankful and joyful.”

Think about the people that God has put in your life: your friends; your siblings; your spouse; your children. If you’re a teacher, think about your students. If you’re a coach, think about your players. If you’re a business owner, think about your staff. There’s a reason that God has put those people in your life. So when you think of those people, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? When you pray for them—if you pray for them—and I hope you do—what do you express in those prayers? And here’s a question: what do those people think you think about them?

I’ve noticed this pattern in myself when I’m praying for the people in my life: I find myself immediately praying for what I want God to do in that person. Does that make sense? So if that person is battling cancer, I’ll pray that God will heal them. If the person just lost their job, I’ll ask God to help them find a new job. If the person is wrestling with addiction, I’ll pray that they’ll have strength to overcome the addiction. So that’s just instinct for me: there’s something wrong, and I’ll ask God to change that wrong thing.

And years ago, I noticed that I tend to do that for my own family. So when I’m pacing around my house in the morning, or when the weather is nicer, walking through the park with my coffee, I always pray for my kids and my wife. But I found myself, for each person, thinking of something wrong or some problem with that person, and praying for that. And one day it hit me how ungrateful that was. And so I’ve tried to shift that approach. Paul says, “In all my prayers for you, I always pray with joy.” So now, as I bring each person in my family to mind, and the first thing I do is just thank God for them. “Lord, thank you for the maturity I see in my son recently. Thank you for my daughter’s kindness and work ethic. Thank you for the fishing trip I got to take with my son. Thank you for the generosity of my wife.” Looking for signs of God’s grace in their lives, and just thanking God for that. And I’m finding that when I start my prayers like that, it changes my heart—because instead of having a primary posture of wanting something, I take this primary posture of joy and gratitude. I still get to the

problems and requests, but I start with gratitude. And I try to do the same thing when I’m praying for the Chapel staff and elders, and my friends.

Is it possible that you need to shift the way you pray for the people you love?

And then, here’s where the encouragement part comes in: Paul teaches us to take that gratitude, and don’t just thank God for them; actually tell them you’re thankful for them! You know I am in my mid-50s. And still to this day, when somebody expresses personal thankfulness to me, it means something. Every once in a while, someone says, “Pastor Dave, I was just praying for you this morning, and thanking God that you’re in my life.” What a beautiful gift to hear those words. And therefore—knowing that about myself moves me to express gratitude to the people around me. And I think that was a big reason Paul was such a powerful encourager. He expressed his gratitude really, really well. He wrote it in letters…but if Paul were alive today, he would be a master of sending short emails and little text messages of thanks and appreciation for the people in his life.

Listen: your life might feel like a prison, but nothing can stop you from encouraging people by being thankful for them.

Secondly, Paul shows us that encouragement is Affectionate. Look at verses 7 and 8: 7 It is right for me to feel this way about all of you, since I have you in my heart and, whether I am in chains or defending and confirming the gospel, all of you share in God’s grace with me. 8 God can testify how I long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus. You know, sometimes when you read the letters of Paul, you feel like he was this cold, intellectual theologian. Or you think he was such a workaholic, traveling the world and starting churches, that he didn’t have much of a heart. But then you read stuff like this, and you realize there was a whole different side to Paul. Remember: this was the first century; Roman Empire. People prized toughness and stoicism—and especially men were supposed to be self-sufficient and not show any softness. But look what Paul says: “I have you in my heart.” “I long for you guys.” Sometimes we men feel like we’d be compromising our manhood to say things like that! But Paul was emotionally whole enough to realize that friendships deserve some heart. Friendships deserve some affection.

Paul says, “I long for you with the affection of Christ Jesus.” That word “affection” literally means “guts” or “inner parts.” It’s the same word used of Jesus when he looks out on the people, and it says he was moved with compassion. Jesus had so much affection and care for them, he felt it in his guts. So Paul’s love for these people wasn’t because of any practical benefits he got from them; he delighted in them because of who they were. His heart ached to see them again.

For some people, expressing affection comes really naturally. One of our elders here at The Chapel is named Sal Dolfi. And when you spend some time around Sal, you can’t help feeling encouraged. He’s outgoing and warm and affectionate—possibly has some connection with the fact that he’s Italian. I honestly don’t know how he’s surviving the pandemic, not being able to hug anyone—he’s having withdrawal symptoms. But Sal is such a great example of affection. For me it doesn’t come as naturally. Might have something to do with me being Northern European. And so I need to be intentional. I need to choose to be more affectionate, and it’s so worth it.

Larry Crabb is a professor and author and Christian counselor. He’s a brilliant guy, but I get the idea he’s wired a little more like me—not naturally affectionate. And I heard him tell a story once about something that happened at the college where he taught. It was the end of the spring semester, and he was in his office, getting ready to leave for the summer. One of his students knocked on his door and said, “I just had to stop by and tell you how much you influenced me this semester.” He was grateful for the compliment, and he said, “What was it that influenced you the most? Was it the

principles of counseling class? Was it the human behavior class?” And she said, “No. I don’t know if you remember this. But earlier in the semester, I was sitting on the campus lawn with some friends. And you came walking past, and you stopped and sat down and chatted with us.” And she said, “That was so encouraging to me, and I’ll never forget it.” And when she left his office, he just shook his head. And he said, “I put so much effort into studying, and crafting lesson plans, and teaching. How easily I forget that what often impacts and encourages people most is just giving them my time and attention. Showing them I value them and just want to be in their presence.” Affection.

Listen: your life might feel like a prison, but nothing can stop you from encouraging people by showing your affection for them.

And then, third, Paul shows us that encouragement is Optimistic. Look at verse 9, 10 and 11: 9 And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, 10 so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, 11 filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God. Now that’s a prayer! Wouldn’t you love to know that someone is praying this kind of prayer for you? Like, “Wow—thank you!” I don’t think I deserve that kind of prayer—but please keep praying it!

And it’s so powerful because it’s optimistic, right? It’s so future-focused. Paul is saying, “Here’s the vision that I have for your life: that you will become a radically loving person—but not a mushy, emotional kind of love; a love that’s guided by knowledge and depth of insight. In other words, love that’s street-smart and wise. I’m praying you’ll love people like that.” He says, “I’m praying that you’ll be pure and blameless”—because I don’t want your reputation to be ruined by lack of integrity. So I’m praying that you will be faithful to your spouse and honest in your business and that you won’t be playing around with things like drunkenness and porn. I’m praying big things for your future!” Do you see how optimistic that is?

And once again, this is such a challenge for me. Because when people ask you to pray for them, what do they usually ask you to pray for? Surface things. I mean, important things—but they tend to be surfacy. Pray for my cancer treatment. Pray for my surgery. Pray for my rehab. Pray that I’ll find a job. And it’s privilege to pray for those kinds of things. But Paul is reminding us that there are other things—deeper things that are worth praying for. Because you know what? You can have your cancer go away, but your heart is still far from God. You can find a great new job, but still be impatient and angry. Do you follow me? You can have successful rehab for your knee replacement, but still have a toxic relationship with your wife. So I’m not saying don’t pray for the surface stuff—of course we should. But if you deeply care for people, take that opportunity to also think about how God may want to work in deeper ways in their life. For example…

Lord, I pray that Jennifer’s chemo treatments will be totally effective, and that you’ll make her body strong and healthy. And would you use this experience to deepen her faith. Remind her of her mortality, and how much she needs you.

Lord, I pray that Bill will find a job that will pay well, and a job that he loves. But Lord, in the meantime, I pray that you will teach him patience. Teach him to trust you and wait on you. Lord don’t let this experience be wasted in his life.

Lord, I pray that Brian’s knee rehab will go smoothly. Get him on his feet soon. And Lord, I pray you’ll use this down time to humble him. Help him to listen better to his wife. Give him more compassion for her physical challenges and her weaknesses. Bring peace to his home.

Those are the kinds of things Paul prayed for the Philippians, and there’s no reason we can’t do the same thing. And again—this is so important—he doesn’t just pray those things for them; he tells them he’s praying those things for them! That’s huge! It’s a little risky. It’s easy for me to say to you, “I’m praying you’ll find a job.” But what if I say, “I’m praying God will use this time of unemployment to make you a more patient person.” That’s a little more risky, right? But in the right context, it’s powerful. And it’s encouraging. Because you’re saying, “Look, I want you to find a job. But I think God has way bigger plans for you than just finding a job! So I’m praying big. I’m praying for you to become more the person that God wants you to be.”

Now: I need to clarify one thing. If you pray on this deeper level for people, and if you tell them you’re praying for them like that, you have to be careful that it doesn’t come off as just a pep talk. Like, “Come on, buddy—everybody knows you’re an impatient jerk, so I’m praying you’ll finally get your act together.” This is not a clever way to push people to self-improvement. Look what Paul says in verse 11: filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes…how? …through Jesus Christ. In other words, the reason I’m praying this, and not lecturing you about it, is because I know the only way this change will happen in you is through the power of Christ. Back in verse 6, Paul said it like this: being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you—who’s that? Who began a good work in them? God did! So Paul says, “I’m confident that the same God who started working in you…will carry it on to completion. In other words, Paul’s optimism has very little to do with them. It has everything to do with God. And that’s why it’s so encouraging. He’s reminding people that the God of all goodness and all blessing is at work in them. And I’m telling you, you can never remind people of that enough.

This past Tuesday, my morning Bible reading was all about when life spins out of control, and we feel helpless. And I always try to take the teaching of that day’s Scripture, and pray that over the people on my prayer list for that day. And one of the guys on my list that day, this really applied to what he’s going through. So after I was done praying, I texted him. And in the text I told him what I’d learned in the Scripture that morning, and I said, “Here’s my prayer for you today: ‘Father, my brother ______ realizes that so many things are out of his control. Help him to trust deeply in your sovereignty today, knowing that all authorities in this world are instruments in your hands. Give him a deep peace, knowing who is truly in control.’ So I told him what I’d prayed, and then I just said, “Blessings brother.” Took me about 3 minutes to send that text.

Within a minute I got a reply back. And I’m going to read his text verbatim. He said, “Brother, thank you for this. How encouraging and kind. I appreciate you.” He got kind of affectionate there, didn’t he?

I would guess that God has put some people around you who are disillusioned or depressed, or they feel alone. And the difference-maker for that person could be you, expressing thankfulness, or affection, or optimism…or all three. I realize your life might be kind of rough right now. You might feel trapped by some really hard things. Paul could relate to being in that position. But those outward circumstances cannot control you on the inside. You are completely free to be a powerful encourager.