New Identity

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Good morning Chapel family. I have question for you: if you could change one thing about yourself, what would you change? Can you think of something? Maybe it’s fear. Anxiety. Your temper. Lust. Envy. Addiction. Unforgiveness. What’s one thing that in your life that you would love to change? You’re convinced your life would be better if that thing would change? Do you have that thing in your mind? Now, here’s the follow-up question: what is it that can actually make that change happen?

You know why this is so important? Because we are living at a moment in culture when it’s so easy to blame everybody else for what’s wrong. Right? It’s so easy to say, “The reason this world has so many problems, is those guys! Those guys need to change! It’s so easy to do that. We all do that, to some degree. But the gospel invites us to focus first on the change needed in us. That doesn’t mean there aren’t things out there that need to change—of course there are. But the deepest change—and the change that we’re most responsible for—is the change that needs to happen in us.

We’re taking this fall to talk about what it means to seek first the kingdom of God in the midst of an angry and divided culture. And here’s a big part of the answer: it means we stop blaming everyone else for what’s wrong, and we start with ourselves. So today we’re going to open Paul’s letter to the Colossians, and we’re going to ask the question: how do I experience real change in myself?

Colossians chapter 3, first 17 verses. Let’s hear God’s Word…

1 Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. 3 For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. 4 When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.

5 Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. 6 Because of these, the wrath of God is coming. 7 You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. 8 But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. 9 Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices 10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.11 Here there is no Gentile or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all.

12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. 16 Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. 17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. This is the Word of God.

So what does it take to change that issue in your life that you were thinking about? This passage answers that question in three ways—here’s the first one:

Know Who You Are. Look again at the first few verses. Verse 1 says you have been raised with Christ. Verse 3 says you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ. And verse 4 says: When Christ…appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. There’s a lot of theology there, but here’s the main point: If you are a believer, your deepest identity is not the family you come from or the school you attended or your wealth or the things you’ve accomplished or the stupid mistakes you’ve made; your deepest identity—the thing that makes you “you”—is your connection with Christ. Jesus re-defines who you are. So set your mind and your heart on that.

If you’re a fan of golf, you know the #1 ranked player in the world is Scottie Scheffler. He’s only 28 years old, but he’s incredibly dominant. So last April after he won the Master’s, CBS Sports wrote an article exploring the secret to his remarkable success. They quoted Scheffler as saying, “…my victory was secure on the cross. And that's a pretty special feeling to know that I'm secure for forever and it doesn't matter if I win this tournament or lose this tournament. My identity is secure for forever." And then the writer of the article, Kyle Porter, said this:

The freedom Scheffler's faith provides—allowing him to be secure in himself knowing all that's required is doing the best he can any given week—is a trait professional golfers strive to achieve through myriad psychological tricks, coaches and techniques. That this belief system is built into the best player on the planet is an extraordinary benefit. In fact, it's among the reasons why he's the best player on the planet.

Isn’t that powerful? The reason he’s the best golfer in the world is that his life is not all about being the best golfer in the world. His life is all about Christ.

So how about you? Are you finding your identity in your performance—happy when you perform well; devastated when you perform badly? Or are you learning to find your identity in something deeper? Paul says, “Think about this: you’ve been raised with Christ; your life is hidden with Christ; and when Christ appears—when he returns—you’re going to be with him.” Theologians call this our “mystical union with Christ.” We are so closely connected with him that what’s true of him becomes true of us. And when we let that sink in, it brings incredible security and stability to our lives.

Look again at verse 4: When Christ, who is your life, appears... What does it mean to be so connected to Christ that you can say, “Christ is my life”?

Tim Keller told a story about a woman from his church who had a history of bad relationships with men. And she was seeing a counselor to help her. So Keller sat down with her once, and asked her how it was going. And he was so amazed with her wisdom, that he wrote down what she said. So here’s what this woman told him. This is Tim Keller’s words, but it’s the woman’s thoughts. She said…

I’m going to my counselor, and a lot of what she has said is right. My counselor said I’ve built my very sense of significance and identity on men. That’s why I’ve been defenseless with them—I simply have needed them too much. All of that is right and helpful. However, my counselor does not have a very good solution for me. My counselor says what I need is to further my education and get a good career. My counselor means well, and I absolutely do need to get myself a good career. But what she’s saying is I should do that so I will feel better about myself. But that would mean I’d be switching from one kind of idol to another. For many years, my heart has been looking at men, and saying, “Unless I have love, I am nothing.” But my counselor wants me to look at my education and career, and say, “Unless I am successful in my career, I am nothing.” I don’t want to be as enslaved to my work as I was to men. I’m being asked to exchange a typical female idol for a typical male idol…..I don’t want either.

This is a wise woman, right? So Keller asked her, “So how are you handling it?” And she actually quoted Colossians 3, verse 4, where it says, “Christ is your life.” And here’s how she explained it:

It’s very practical. When I go to church and worship—when what Jesus did for me is so real and so wonderful…in my heart, I think of the men in my life, and I say—I speak to them, “I’m glad to know you—and I certainly wouldn’t mind being married…but you are not my life. Christ is my life. I’m done making anything else my life.” I don’t want to look to men or to a career. A career can’t die for me. If I fail in my career, that will beat me up all my life. But if I fail Jesus, he still forgives me. He is my life.

That is so wise. And you might not be tempted to find your identity in relationships; for you maybe it’s being smart; maybe it’s being thin; maybe it’s a whole combination of things. And all of those things, if they’re going well, can give you a temporary sense of self…but ultimately they will crush you. And this woman was learning to set her heart and her mind so fully on Christ that it changed the way she viewed her identity. Are you learning to do that?

Because listen: if you want to change deeply, this is where it starts! You have to be rooted in your identity in Christ. Now: it could be that you don’t have a relationship with Christ. The only reason that golfer and that woman in Tim Keller’s church could find their identity in Christ is that they had personally received him. And maybe you haven’t. You believe there’s a god; maybe you grew up in a religious family; but you’ve never made it personal. And your next move is to make it personal. You don’t need me to do that; you don’t need a church ritual to do that; it’s between you and God. Just look at the cross and say, “Yes—I believe; I need your forgiveness; I need your power in my life; and I receive you today.”

Then, as a believer in Christ, when you see things in your life that need to change, here’s what you do—second point: Take Off the Old. Look at verse 5: Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature. That’s kind of a violent statement, isn’t it? He doesn’t say, “Just try to avoid those things, if you can, alright? Try to cut back a little bit. What does he say? “Kill it.” Put it to death. Choke it. Hold it under water till the bubbles stop. He’s talking about taking extreme measures.

And the Bible is so brilliant…because it lists off a group of sins, and it’s exactly the stuff we struggle with today. If this were written in September 2024, it couldn’t be more accurate. So Paul is basically saying, “Look—I know what you’re struggling with. I get it.” And he really gives three different categories of things that we misuse. You ready? We misuse sex, we misuse money, and we misuse other people. Sex, money and other people.

So, first, we misuse sex. Look back at verse 5 again: Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires… Do you realize that every New Testament letter that’s written to a church warns against sexual sin? Every one! It’s the one thing—when you look at a room full of people—you don’t have to guess whether there’s sexual sin going on. There is. Whether it’s pornography, or Christian couples rationalizing sex before they’re married, or married people having affairs—it’s happening. And the only way to deal with something that powerful and that addictive is to take extreme measures.

A few years ago, a friend of mine admitted being in an affair with someone from work. And I said, “Look, if you really want to get out of this, you have to take extreme measures.” And he did—he quit his job. That’s kind of a big step, right? And then he changed his cell phone number, and got a new email address. Because he knew that anything less wouldn’t kill it. He would fall back into it. And today he’s got a great marriage and several kids and that affair is ancient history. Full forgiveness and restoration. But he had to take a drastic step.

Another friend of mine started to get romantically involved with someone in his neighborhood. He confessed it and sought forgiveness from his wife…and then they took a drastic step: they put their house up for sale, and they moved out of the neighborhood. Because they knew if they stayed the temptation would still be there. Extreme measures.

So here’s my question for you: what would it mean for you to put to death any sexual sin in your life? To stop toying with it and kill it before it kills you?

Next thing—we misuse money. Look at the last part of verse 5—it says and greed, which is idolatry. So if we’re never content with what we have, and we always want more, the Bible says we’ve made an idol out of material things. It’s become our god. So how do you kill the idol of greed? You refuse to obey its commands. You do the opposite of what greed is telling you to do. Greed says, “You need that new car…cell phone…shirt…custom grill…whatever.” And you say, “Actually, I’m content with what I have.” You’re in a restaurant and the check comes, and greed says, “Leave a 5% tip—that’s all she deserves.” And you say, “I’m not going to be that person.” And you give…7%. Right? No—you give 20%—because money’s not your idol. And after a while, you’re not a slave to it anymore—because you’ve put it to death.

Okay—this is getting too personal—let’s move on. The third thing we misuse is people. Look at verse 8: But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. What do all those things have in common? They’re all relational things. Ways we treat other people. So let’s make this really practical. There is a high probability that this fall, someone whom you disagree with politically is going to say something or post something online that you strongly disagree with. That person might live in the same house as you. And you will feel your pulse rise, and you will feel yourself getting angry. And the natural part of you will want to do…what? Show anger, rage, malice, filthy language from your lips. You will want to lash out. And you know if you do that, it’s going to be game on, right? The temperature will get cranked up, and the fight will be on. But because of your connection with Christ, you can completely change where that interaction is going. It doesn’t mean you don’t share your view—maybe you do—but you do it in a way that shows respect and love for the other person. You do it in a Christ-like way.

Let’s stay on this “people” topic for a minute. The reason our relationships are so important to God is because the gospel changes how we view people. Look at verse 11: Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all. See, for Greeks, the rest of the world were “Barbarians.” For Jews, the rest of the world were “the uncircumcised.” The ancient world was all about “us” and “them.” We never do that anymore today, do we? “Oh—you’re liberal?” “Oh—you’re conservative?” “Oh, you live in that town In those apartments?” “Oh—you’ve been divorced twice?” And the gospel says, “Welcome to a place where we don’t label people anymore.” You know what label the gospel puts on people? Daughter or son of the king. Sister. Brother. Because of Christ, every other label and every other distinction fades into insignificance.

“Put to death whatever belongs to your earthly nature.” Have you ever seen a documentary about a serial killer? My wife likes to watch those; I’m not sure why. But sometimes they’ll have a psychologist comment on the mind of a killer, and they say, “Something inside this person had died. Their ability to show compassion or care about others had just died.” So we all know it’s possible to put to death some good part of our selves. And Paul is simply saying, “It’s also possible to put to death some dark part of ourselves.” I recently attended the viewing of a friend who passed away, and one of the things people were celebrating was that he was 32 years sober. 32 years! And it just reminded me: people

really change. Because of our connection with Christ, we can actually choke out the things that are ruining us.

Know who you are, take off the old, and then here’s where it starts to get really exiting—third point: Put on the New. Verses 12 through 17 is one of the most beautiful pictures of what our lives can look like. So as I re-read those verses, imagine this happening in your family and your relationships. Colossians 3, verses 12 through 17…

12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. 16 Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. 17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

These are some of the most beautiful words in the New Testament. And this could easily be a 10-week sermon series, but let me just make a few high-level observations. Actually three things about this vision that Paul lays out.

First, it’s Relational. Once again, God is really into your relationships. And if you haven’t done this already, you should memorize the second part of verse 12. I repeat this to myself all the time. Whey I’m about to enter into a potentially volatile situation, I will say, “Lord, help me to clothe myself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.” I’ll picture myself putting those things on like I’m putting on a coat. How much different would the atmosphere in our homes be if we clothed ourselves like that?

He says we should “bear with each other.” Man, if you spend any time with people, you better learn how to bear with them. You know what that means? It means we expect people to be annoying…and when they are annoying, we learn how to let it slide. We’ve got to learn how to not make every little offense a big deal! Give that person the benefit of the doubt. Realize how annoying you can be sometimes. I call that having a “cushion of grace.” Bear with each other.

And then sometimes there really are offenses, and wounds. And when that happens, it says forgive them—just as the Lord forgave you. Talk about it; bring it to the person’s attention; but at the end of the day, forgive—let it go. This is so interesting, because it doesn’t use the typical word for “forgive.” It uses the Greek verb charizomai, which is a form of the word charis, which means “grace.” You could translate this: If you have a grievance against someone, grace them—just as God has graced you. Because if you don’t show grace—if you hold on to it—it will hurt you more than it hurts them. It will be like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

Second, this vision is Counter-Cultural. Back in the first century, when this was written, certain things on this list were not considered virtues at all. For example, being humble and gentle were considered weakness. But Jesus showed that humility and gentleness are actually very powerful and actually require incredible strength. So in some ways, Paul is presenting a way to live that’s out of step with the broader culture. So think about this: it could be that the thing that needs to change in your life, because you know it’s wrong, our culture thinks it’s just fine. Does that make sense? So maybe you’re in a sexual relationship that’s not honoring to God, or you’re using money in a way that’s very self-

serving, but the people around you would say, “What’s the problem? There’s nothing wrong with that.” But you’re listening to a voice that’s deeper than what our culture says. So rather than letting culture define the good life, let Jesus define that for you.

Okay, and third, this kind of life is Possible. Does that sound too obvious? It’s not. Because a lot of people who claim to be Christians don’t really believe their lives can change. They believe God loves them; they’re pretty sure they’re going to heaven when they die; but they don’t have any real hope that the destructive habits in their lives or the dysfunction in their families will ever change. They have convinced themselves that nobody’s perfect; I’m not perfect; this is just the way I am. That is a lie straight from Satan. It is not just the way you are. You know who we are? Look at verse 12—we are God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved. We’ve been raised up with Christ—just like Jesus was raised out of the grave on Easter morning, we’ve been raised with him in power. We have a constant, fresh supply of his power to put to death the destructive things in our life, and to choose things that bring peace and healing to our relationships. We’re not just stuck in our sins and faults; we are connected to the greatest power in the universe—the living Jesus Christ. Amen? Let’s live like it.

This beautiful vision of life is possible. Because Jesus is alive. And whatever it is in your life that needs to change, believe me, Jesus is more passionate to change that thing than you are! It might not change all at once. You might slip; you might fall back. But Jesus invites you to step toward it. Don’t settle for the way things are. You have the power of Christ on your side.

Know who you are.

Make the hard decision to take off the old.

And in faith, put on the new.

Rise for the benediction…

Benediction

And now may the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ give you the humility

to stop blaming others for what’s wrong, and to start with yourself.

May God give you the wisdom

to know who you are

to take off the old

and to put on the new.

And may he use you this week to bring healing and hope to a world that desperately needs it.

In the name of Christ, who is your life,

Amen.